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He's missing a few pickets from his fence.
She's not the brightest crayon in the box.
He's missing a barb from his wire.
She's a couple of credits short of a degree.
His planet and ours don't revolve around the same sun.
Her elevator doesn't go all the way to the top floor.
The light is on but nobody's home.
He's one book short of a library.
She's one link short of a chain.
The buses don't go out that far.
He's a few strings short of a guitar.
She's a few horns short of a symphony.
He's one car short of a dealership.
She's a few eggs short of a carton.
His Christmas tree has no star on top.
Her cake has no icing.
He's not driving in the same lane.
She's a couple of elves shy of a good workshop.
He's a couple of jingles short of a good sleighbell.
She's one exit short of a freeway.
He lost a few tiles on re-entry.
She's a salad bowl short of a place setting.
He doesn't have all his dogs on a leash.
She's a few sunflowers short of trailmix.
He's a bassist short of a band.
She's one arrow shy of a quiver.
He's one megabyte shy of a hard drive.
She's got two wires in her brain that don't connect.
He's one brick short of a load.
She's one loop-de-loop short of a roller coaster.
He's one pancake short of a stack.
She's one bat short of a belfry.
His hat is too tight.
She's not the sharpest tool in the shed.
He's all hat and no cattle.
She's not playing with a full deck.
He's a jigger short of a fifth.
All her puppies don't bark.
He's one sandwich short of a picnic.
She's one can short of a six-pack.
His driveway doesn't go all the way to the street.
She's not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
He's one Brady short of a bunch.
She's a few fries short of a Happy Meal.
He's got too many birds on his antennae.
The engines running, but no one is behind the wheel.
She's several nuts shy of a crunch bar.
He's one puppy short of a litter.
Her blip left the radar screen.
He's one taco short of a combo meal.
She's not playing with a full deck.
He's a few ants short of a picnic.
She's one chair short of a dinette set.
You've hit bottom and commenced digging.
He's one eggroll short of a PuPu Platter.
She's all foam and no beer.
He doesn't have both his oars in the water.
She's one operation short of a malpractice suit.
He's a screen door on a submarine.
She has the mental agility of a sea slug.
He's not the sharpest cheddar in the dairy case.
She's not cooking on the front burner.
He's dialed up knowledge and got a busy signal.
She fell out of the Stupid Tree and hit every branch on the way down.
His wheel is turning but his hamster is dead.
She's as dense as a London fog.
He's a bubble shy of plumb.
She looked in a bowl of Cheerios and said, "Hey look, doughnut seeds."
He thinks a quarterback is a refund.
She's not the brightest bulb in the chandelier.
If he had half a brain, he'd be dangerous.
She couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were printed on the heel.
She sits on the TV and watches the couch.
He thinks a quarterback is a refund.
She's as sharp as a bag of wet mice.
He's dumber than a box of rocks.
Her pilot light has gone out.
He's one bong hit away from no brain cells left.
He has a cracked bell in his steeple.
A few electric shock treatments this side of catatonia.